I saw this on Metalbond's blog and I am going to pretty much paste it directly as I think he did a great job elaborating on the topic. I think he really captured the concept and ideas.
"Guys, this is important. A lot of what is depicted on this site involves what appears to be forced action, torture, beatings and the like … but please know that everything shown here is consensual. That is, nobody depicted on this blog is getting restrained and beaten up against his will. It’s never acceptable to put a man in physical restraints against his will, or to do anything to him that he does not want to have happen.
All of the porn pictures you see here about a supposedly “straight” guy getting tricked into bondage and then mercilessly fucked, forced to suck cock and pissed on, well … as you probably know all of that is fantasy. They guy is a paid porn actor, and he wants it. That’s why every Bound Gods and Bound In Public video begins and ends with an interview with the subjects, in which they discuss this. Sure, it may look like things are getting a bit rough at times, but everyone needs to know that nobody is getting beaten up against his will.
Of course many of us fantasize about being tied up and “worked over” hard by a sadistic prison guard or military drill instructor, or doing that to another guy, and there is nothing wrong with having such interests and desires … but there is a difference between such a fantasy, and what can cross the line into actual abuse.
Personally, I have been in situations where that line has been crossed, and it is not pleasant, not hot, and it is definitely not acceptable.
Many of my more vanilla gay friends, guys who know what I am into but really don’t “get it,” if you know what I mean, sometimes crack jokes that rub me the wrong way. We’ll be at a bar or party and there will be some annoying guy, acting like a creep, and they will say something like, “why don’t you go get your gag and shut that guy up” or “he belongs locked up in your cage.”
But what I always try to explain, to make really clear to them, is that I don’t have any desire whatsoever to put my handcuffs on any guy who does not WANT that to happen. I guess I am just not wired that way.
The bottom line is that it’s OK to have a fantasy about something that is truly forced, to beat off about it while looking at porn, or even to “act out” such things in “role play” … as long as whatever you do in real life is consensual."